Gasp!

The Year in Pictures: Albert

Dear Albert, You Suck
Through a Deli Window
Birmingham, Alabama
Fall, 2006

The Year in Pictures: A Long Walk

One More Walk to the Bookstore
North Loop
Austin, Texas
Late Summer, 2006

The Year in Pictures: Snow Cone

Grapefruit Snow Cone
Fiesta parking lot at I-35
Austin, Texas
Summer, 2006

The Year in Pictures: Christopher

Christopher's Waiting
Hyde Park Apartment
Austin, Texas
Late Summer, 2006

The Year in Pictures: Dog Head

Missing Dog Head
Sign at a North Austin Cafe
Austin, Texas
Summer, 2006

The Year in Pictures: Hyde Park

Too Many Storms
Hyde Park
Austin, Texas
Summer 2006

The Year in Pictures: LBJ Library

A Unique Filing System
Reading Room
The Lyndon Baines Johnson Presidential Library
Austin, Texas 2006

The Year in Pictures: April 2006

Sundown at Indiantown
Old Saybrook, CT
April 30, 2006

The Year in Pictures

Since everyone is on vacation, I've decided to post pictures I took from 2006. They represent another year lived, more experiences gained. Some photos might be offensive, but they represent my experience of a time and place.

Plotting the Play
Hyde Park Apartment
Austin, Texas
December 2005

Meet the New Hires

Phillip Paul is dressed in his finest black tuxedo while Angela dons her latest black and tan. Maybe someday Phillip Paul will learn to keep his eyes open for pictures.

(Click on the picture for a better view.)

Year-End Massive Missive

It came up during one of Gasp's staff meetings that we should write a holiday letter to friends and associates of the blog. Since we spent our annual budget on salt water taffy and ate it during a hellacious Greyhound ride from Dallas to Austin, we are choosing to write a "holiday entry" this year. Maybe next year, we'll spring for one of those fabulous e-cards.

Freelance Poets

My fiance tells me that there is no such thing as a "freelance poet."

How did we get on this topic? He is a writer/editor. In the past, he's had to deal with the public, including those who describe themselves as "freelance poets."

Since I've done my share of hanging out at poetry readings, I know pretentiousness and irrelevancy firsthand. Not to say that poetry itself is that way. Many of my dead mentors have been poets, including T.S. Eliot, Kerouac, and a number of Buddhist monks. Still, some of my favorite blowhard writer stereotypes come from hanging out in the poetry circuit.

So is there such a thing as a "freelance poet"? He says no. And because he says no, I say yes. Someone out there being hired as an independent contractor, writing poetry for a small magazine. It may not be the Saturday Evening Post, but it provides a coffee allowance.

Then again, maybe the term "freelance poet" is redundant. After all, how many poets are hired for that type of work. We don't call screenwriters, "freelance screenwriters", do we?

Is there such a thing as a "freelance poet"? What do you think?

House Rules, Again

More and more people are asking me why I don't allow comments on Gasp. Longtime readers will remember the problems I've had before with allowing comments. I'm not going to rehash them here. Those experiences, coupled with my recent issues with comment spam, have forced me to disallow that option.

But... I also miss the dialogue. A number of you have chosen to talk to me via email, and I've enjoyed getting to know a number of you. Unfortunately, emails limit conversations to the "private realm" and I would like to have more give and take.

So, we'll try it again. Several years ago, after my last comment fiasco, I posted an entry called "House Rules." I'm going to repost it again, since it still applies today.

House Rules
I’ve been keeping a journal for almost a year now and I’ve never had to delete comments. So, to keep everyone honest, here are a few of the reasons I’ll delete comments and why I deleted a whole series of them this afternoon.

1) I do not accept comments from ex-boyfriends. If I even suspect I’ve gone on a date with you, I’ll delete it. There are a few exceptions to this rule, such as former paramours that I’m currently in touch with. They know who they are. If I’m not in touch with you and you’ve claimed to be my soulmate, know that I’ve already found my soulmate and you aren’t it.

2) Anyone I suspect is off the deep end gets deleted. If you’re wondering about your current mental health, please seek attention from a competent therapist. If you think you might be mentally ill, you are.

3) No flaming me or being nasty to others. Name calling is stupid. Kumbaya people, Kumbaya.

4) No threatening or stalking. Cyber-stalking is a crime, and if you scare me in any way, shape or form, I'll delete and take it up with your ISP provider and law enforcement.

5) Make your point in less than 150 words. Free speech doesn’t mean a free ride. If you have that many thoughts on a topic, start your own blog.

You’re free to disagree with me or others, but just know that when you visit my site, you’re visiting my virtual abode and there are house rules. I don’t think this is too much to ask.

Now, after reading all that I'm sure you know what some of the issues were back then. Hopefully there won't be a repeat of them.

Thanks, and have a pleasant holiday.

Back - With a Better Internet Connection

I finally came back to Alabama last night, and hopefully you'll pardon my scruffy appearance. Perhaps someone could shoot me an email and tell me why sitting in a car for nine hours can be so tiring.

There's plenty to do here... Unpacking, deleting 150 emails from various accounts, sleeping. And a slew of work piled on my to-do list.

So much to say, so little energy... But posting will resume tomorrow. Thanks for your kind emails. (Oh, returning emails. That's another thing I gotta do...)

Book Review

My review of the book There Goes the Neighborhood: Racial, Ethnic and Class Tensions in Four Chicago Neighborhoods and Their Meaning for America by William Julius Wilson and Richard P. Taub is published in today's Decatur Daily. Pick up a copy at your local Tennessee Valley newstand, or you can read the online edition.

Slow Connections

I have to make this quick and easy. I'm *still* not back in Alabama, as I haven't received Christopher's ashes yet. The computer I'm using has the slowest internet connection east of the Mississippi. There appears to be just enough power to do my freelance work, and maybe post this entry.

And so I begin:

1) Thank you for your emails. Once again, it's taking me a little while to respond back. I apologize for that, but I will write you back soon.

2) I decided to become a Kitty Mother again. Last Thursday, I adopted two 17 week old kittens named Angela and Phil. They don't replace Christopher. No one could ever do that. And while I'm still grieving, I also think that there are too many animals in the world without homes. My grandmother paid the adoption fees as a Christmas present to me. At some point, I'm hoping to post pictures.

3) It has been brought to my attention how often I start things on Gasp and don't follow through. Yes, that's true. When I'm back on my internet feet, I'll finish what I started... Yes, it bugs me as well.

4) I would love to allow comments on Gasp. Seriously. Unfortunately, I'm still getting nailed with comment spam from the few times I allowed comments. There's nothing more mortifying to me than realizing that *everyone else* has seen the 41 porn comments on my blog. Hate it, hate it, hate it. So, please keep in mind that the lack of comments has nothing to do with squashing discussion.

5) Have you ever had anything in your life that has made you feel radically different? That's what the past three weeks has done for me. It's as if Christopher is kicking my ass from the astral. All of a sudden, I feel like another phase of my life has begun. Whereas before I was depressed and pensive about it, now I'm ready to run wild through the forest. I can't explain it. Creatively, things are bubbling and old stuff has settled.

6) One of the questions that has plagued me recently is this: If I died tomorrow, what would I have to show for it? And if I didn't die tomorrow, what would I have to show for it?

7) Have you ever sat back and watched how the blogosphere works? There are plenty of times I consider leaving comments on blogs, but then I realize how often discussions are an excuse for arguing. In the past, my participation in these discussions drained my creative energy. Hence, the great Gasp silence of 2005. Maybe it doesn't matter, since I'm certain I would've gotten flamed on more than one occasion.

8) In the same vein, isn't it funny how many people speak with great authority on things they know little about? (A very awkward sentence, but I'm not changing it.) I've been a part of the blogosphere now for a few years. I've watched bloggers self-consciously create Net Caricatures of themselves, or who they wish to be. People reading their blogs think that these exaggerations are real. Of course, it's not true. No one could be an expert on all things, or the world's worst cynic, or the most righteous person on Earth. Sometimes, these blogs develop cult followings and readers leave comments like, "You're my hero." Hard to believe, but I've seen it more than once. Very strange.

Personally, I've been complaining lately about feeling like a perpetual beginner. Maybe I don't give myself enough credit for what I do know. But it seems that the more I learn, the less I know.

The key to life is remaining teachable. Well, one of the keys anyway...

Sweet Mother of Pearl, I'm babbling. So much for quick and easy. I'll come back with more organized thoughts soon. I have a bunch of stuff I had planned on posting before all this happened. Yes, that includes book stuff. Soon. Very, very soon...